DRINK-UP: Whatever Could it Be?
Tiny Town, USA – Alert citizen X was crossing the bridge of sighs at EastEduCorp.com. X, looked down and noticed a lovely bright green radiator-beverage spilling from the maw of a corporation tube.
Said image-taker reported the beautiful effluent to the second responders at the Department of Environmental Conversation and it is reported that the jolly green liquid is nothing more than glycol. As we all know, Glycol is in a class of organic compounds belonging to the the alcohol family. So, you know, it's good for you
In the molecule of glycol, two hydroxyl (-OH) groups are attached to different carbon atoms. You'll some times hear a local saying something about "knocking back a half pint of ethylene glycol" to get themselves right in the morning, especially if "there isn't any Sterno around."
Joanne B. of Lansing posted: "Saw it while walking and reported it. Then when I came back through the Cornell employee said it was glycol from the heating system of one of the buildings and they were trying to figure out which one. I hope they figure it out soon."
We'd show you a picture of its atomic structure but why should we bother?
The corporation's agency of safety told the folks here that it was nothing more than a "storm drain dye test" ... That's the most we can make of it.
Another rumor spread that a performance-enhancing human electrolyte-replacement fluid the color of Lime Green Kool-Aid was rejected by all participants, especially the children, in the organization's summer camp program owing to the "foul Jonestown tasting piss water" ... Subsequently forty gallons of the stuff was poured into a storm drain that ran into a human-made lake.
That's the most we can make of it.
– tinytowntimes.com staff